Friday

I Will Not Leave You

"Son, I'm going to grab a quick bath, okay?"

"Uh, huh," he mumbled from the middle of my bed, surrounded by big pillows and covered in thick blankets.

He was taking a sick day from school and the rest of the family was in the school drop-off line.

I decided to grab the few minutes of quiet because I knew they would be fleeting.

I shut the door with my son on the other side, ran a hot bath and slipped into the tub.

The warm water eased my hurried mind.

In the quiet, I closed my eyes. A few minutes passed....

And that's when I heard an urgent guttural cry, a scream for help.

I jumped from the water, grabbed my towel and threw open the door. I found my feverish son standing in the middle of my room, shaking and crying in fear.

"What?? What happened? Are you okay?" I glanced around the room with a pounding heart.

Through sobs and snotty tears, "I couldn't find you. I couldn't find you, I couldn't find you," he repeated over and over.

"Son, I was in the bath! Why did you think I left?" I said with a trembling voice.

"I don't know. I just forgot. Sometimes, I'm afraid I will be left alone and not have you and Daddy," he sobbed uncontrollably.

I grabbed him by the arms and glared into his eyes and said with all the love and firmness I possessed, "I will not leave. I WILL NOT leave you. I WILL NOT LEAVE YOU."

And then I hugged him and we both cried.

Even after I'd comforted him, the words banged around in my heart, I will not leave you.

Settled back in bed, my hubby returned home with our toddler to grab a few items and head to work. I told him what happened.

Understandably, he thought it was ridiculous that my son knew I was taking a bath, only to forget and get hysterical, for no reason. He blamed it on him not feeling well.

I agreed.

But I couldn't shake those words from my head.

So, I sat down and listened to my heart.

This is what I heard: "I will not leave you, Kristen. I will not leave you. Even though you know I am here, you doubt Me. Some days you feel alone, isolated, afraid. I will not leave you. I WILL NOT leave you. I WILL NOT LEAVE YOU."

It was as if God grabbed me by the arms, glared into my eyes and said it with all the love and firmness He possessed.

And I believed Him.


*Updated* Would you please pray with me for this family? I met them a few weeks ago, they are staying in Texas to receive medical care for their precious new son. Today, he underwent surgery and this promise is especially needed today. Thank you!

87 comments:

Living with Lindsay said...

Awww, what a sweet post. :)

Kim said...

Thanks for this reminder. I need it today.

MommyAmy said...

I think all of us need to KNOW that we're not alone. It's an innate human need.

D... said...

Powerful and so very true. Just like we'll never leave our kids, God will never leave us. Like you do, we just have to believe it of Him.

Jackie said...

This. Is. Good.

Lisa said...

YEAH, THAT IS SO POWERFUL.
THANK YOU FOR SHARING THIS.
WE ALL NEEDED TO HEAR IT.

HUGS FROM MAINE

http://sophie4me.blogspot.com/

Lora Lynn @ Vitafamiliae said...

Oh, this is a good one. Well said, friend. Well said.

Tammy said...

So true!

Sounds like my son who dawdles up the grocery aisle....as I move on to the NEXT row over, I hear, "MOM?!?!?"

I've told him a hundred times the same thing, "Son, I will not leave you"

It Feels Like Chaos said...

Such a great post. I love it when God uses something that happens with our children to teach us something awesome about our relationship with Him!

Momof4 said...

Beautiful words - a picture of Deuteronomy 31:6. Thanks for a touching reminder.

Amber @ Classic Housewife said...

Oh my gosh, I KNOW that feeling. Recently had the same thing happen with my 3 yr old son who woke up after Daddy had gone to bed early with a headache and I was in the shower. Turned off the water to hear his panicked screaming because he couldn't find me. There is NOTHING else that does that to your hear other than your child in danger/fear. NOTHING. Thank you for turning it around and relating it to us and God, our Father, who will truly never leave us. Thank you. :)

Nicole said...

Its so interesting to me that we know God's heart a little bit more when we become parents. Beautiful post.

punkinmama said...

Wow, at first I was thinking, "That poor, sweet boy." And relating it to my own Punkin. I was near tears as I imagined Punkin afraid and "lost" like that.

Didn't expect the way you turned it around at the end, but boy, it was the perfect way to reflect on God and His love for us.

a Tonggu Momma said...

As an adoptive momma, whose daughter understandably struggled with that same fear for months and months, I wanted to say thank you for such a wonderfully spiritual reminder.

Dorci Harris said...

Fantastic.

mommy4life said...

crying right now...

Thank you so much, I needed this more than you know today!

carriecaribou said...

Makes me want to go wake up my kids and give them giant hugs! Such a good reminder that God feels that same intense love and care (and even moreso!) for us.
PS: I love your blog!

Norse, Jesica, and Boden said...

What an example you and your husband are to your son. When he knows that his parents will never leave him it will only reinforce that his heavenly Father won't either. What a beautiful picture of a godly family. Blessings to you as you raise your world changers.

Rina said...

That's beautiful.

Valarie Lea said...

Ok you have gotten me teary eyed again... :)

Icedream said...

I also needed to read this. More than you could know. Thank you so much!

Sandra said...

Isn't it awesome how God reveals these things to us? Thanks for the story.

Messy Jessy said...

You sure know how to get a girl all choked up! I love those moments of clarity---so meaningful.

Thanks for sharing.

The BLAH BLAH BLAHger said...

Praise God for his unconditional and everlasting love!!!

Anonymous said...

Thank you for sharing this story with us! Isn't it amazing how God can use the simplest things to remind us of how awesome He is?!!

~ Tina

P.S.He loves you.. said...

that's about right.

Cheri-Beri said...

Zech. 3:17

The Lord your God is with you,
He is mighty to save.
He will take great delight in you,
He will quiet you with His love,
He will rejoice over you with singing.

:-)

Oma aka Meme said...

thank you for sharing your story about our God you will never leave us-me or you
I hope that you put this story in a memory book to share with your lad when he is a man- because stories like these are family history
soft hugs from Meme

jenjen said...

What a sweet story. Thank you for sharing it with us.

Jen

Dill Family said...

As I wait, my nearly 2 week old son is now in surgery and the love I didn't know I could ever feel sustains me as I wait, knowing I too could never leave this sweet child I have just met... I know my Lord sits with me, waiting too. I find my comfort in knowing he IS here!
Thank you for your post!

Jessica said...

It is amazing when God speaks so clearly thru our children!

JanMary said...

Love it when God speaks to us like that - thanks for sharing.

Homesteader in Training said...

The Lord has a way of speaking to us through our kids, doesn't He?
Cherish every moment.
Happy Friday!

~*Michelle*~ said...

Bravo Bravo!

I love it when God speaks through others (especially His love for children) and reassures us that He is always with us.


Peace~
*~Michelle~*

Pam said...

Not to be redundant, but...that was powerful. Thanks for listening to God and sharing it with us.

Mom to 5...Daughter of the King said...

Thanks for that reminder this morning. I think I needed it....

Henley on the Horn said...

What a precious story!

Charlotte said...

http://mama2tlc.blogspot.com/2009/01/commitment.html

I recently wrote about my own experience with this. As a grown woman! After 20 years, I have been reconnecting with my biological parents, and desperately needed to know that my daddy wouldn't leave me again. He very sweetly reminded me that God is in control and God will never leave me. This post is so relevant and carries so much meaning for each of us. Thankyou.

Jenn said...

Loved this post! It is so true. We so easily forget that our Heavenly Father loves us more than we can ever imagine. He will never leave us because He cares for every hair on our head. He is always beside us even if we choose to walk away from Him. Thanks for sharing this with us.

Bridget said...

Great post, Kristen! :)

Shara said...

Very, very encouraging Kristen. Thank you so much for this.

Mrs. Naz of All That Naz & Becoming Me said...

Thank you for sharing this beautiful truth

Sarah said...

Wow, Kristen, what a touching story. Why is it that in the back of my mind, I AM afraid, even though I know in mt heart that He will never leave me? I'm going to think and pray about this all day! Thanks for sharing.

Wendy said...

Wow! What an AWESOME post! I needed to be reminded of that more that you know!! Thanks so much for sharing!

Kasey Hunt said...

Great post!

Susan said...

Very inspirational. Thank you.

Kacie said...

So true. I grew up with a great family, but I still look with fear at my friends thinking - will they leave me?? That's the product of moving so much as a child.

Praise God for His faithfulness.

Scarlett said...

Thank you so much for this precious reminder!

Jen - Balancing beauty and bedlam said...

Isn't HE amazing like that...
This is the second post that have been such a wonderful confirmation to me today...this being the last day of my hubby's job. :)
Thank you for the reminder.

Sarah said...

I have learned more about the nature of God parenting my children than I have learned anywhere else. Sometimes it's like a tap on the shoulder.

steadymom said...

My daughter spent the first four years of her life in an orphanage. This rings so true of our at times painful experience of a child who naturally cannot trust. No matter how often we say, We'll never leave you, her heart just won't let her believe it.

Yet. Thankfully God is into restoration.

Christie said...

Kristen,

Thank you for the wonderful reminder. It brought tears to my eyes...I guess we all need to be reassured sometimes.

God Bless!

Christie

MissMeliss said...

Wow. That is so true. God is good, and reminds us when we need it. Through our children, even.

Blessings.

Amanda said...

sooooo needed to hears this ! thanks for sharing!

Lori Robertson said...

Thank you for sharing that this morning. I hope he feels better soon.

Lorie said...

I remember when my son was born, 3.5 years ago, being amazed at how strong my love for him was & realizing how much more my Father loved me. This was a good reminder to me. I haven't been spending time with Him like I say I want to. I can find time to be on the computer, though. Priority check. Thanks so much for the reminder. And, I'm praying for that sweet family. I'm SO blessed to have healthy children. I just couldn't imagine having to go through what they are. Please, Lord, we take refuge in You.

I Am Boymom said...

Wow! What a touching experience! Isn't it amazing how He can communicate what we need to hear through a seemingly inconsequential experience? I really needed that reminder today. Thanks.

Chris said...

What an amazing/surreal feeling. I got shivers when I read it. Interesting that you and your husband felt differently about the experience.

justusseven said...

Thanks for the inspiration this morning!

Amblin said...

Now that was a beautiful post and a wonderful reminder to me today as I face something that is huge in my life.

Thank you for being willing to post this. I needed to read it and the Lord has used it in a mighty way for me.

Amblin

Shannon said...

Kristen, this is just beautiful.

kristi said...

This post made me cry. My son, being Autistic, goes through severe anxiety. I have to constantly reassure him.

I know God loves me but some days I feel so alone so I appreciate your post today, more than ever, it touched me deep inside my heart.

Lois Lane II said...

How precious -- it brought tears to my eyes.

Lisa said...

Great post, Kristen. I love how our children show us the way.

MommaJen said...

beautiful; this brought tears to my eyes. We all need reassurance from our parents - earthly and heavenly. Thanks for sharing!

Courtney said...

wow.i really don't know what else to say. that was VERY powerful. thanks.

Favaunt said...

Thank you Kristen. I really needed that reminder today.

littletoesandcheerios said...

This post made me cry.

But then I smiled...did I win cookies??? I can get your email due to my stupid computer, so here's my email mommyflintstone@yahoo.com
Thanks and beautiful post.

Sarah said...

This is a very powerful post. I am so grateful for this reminder that God will never leave or forsake me and nothing can take me away from His love. Thank you for writing this.

For Your Inspiration said...

Thanks for sharing. It's always nice to know that no matter what happens, we are never alone.

Upstatemomof3 said...

That is an awesome post. I think we all could use to hear this every now and again. Thank you for the reminder. God Bless!!!

Sandy Toes said...

Sweet and full of love!
~sandy toe

IE Mommy Blogger said...

What a beautiful reminder the God say s He will never leave us or forsake us. My twins get that same way if they can't see me after a while.

The Glamorous Life said...

How do you manage to make me CRY when I expect to laugh?

Such a gift you have.

I am off to steal the Fro guidelines...can I find them on my own?

I better look before I ask huh?
After all...maybe they are in the bath.

:)

Megan said...

Great reminder! He will NEVER leave us!

Carolina Mama said...

Feel free to add your friend to Pray It Friday. The Virtual Prayer Chain. He's always listening too.

Pat Anderson said...

So interesting you should send this to me today. My 7 yo dd had one of her frequent feelings which she labeled "that lonely feeling" when she was very little. She comes to me and says, "Mommy I have that lonely feeling," and she needs me hug her and reassure her. As I read the post I thought about my own dear daughter and how I need to once again reassure her that even better than me is God, who will always be there for her. So it looks like I'm about the 1000's person to comment just accept my thanks.
Pat Anderson (Twitter name: PatinMB)

Debbie said...

Thanks for this... I really needed this today.

Thank you God that you will never leave me! Help me to remember it even when I don't feel you near me.

Debbie

km said...

In all my mom's years teaching Kindergarten Sunday School, she always used the child's own hand as their visual. One word for each finger. God says, "I will never leave, ______!" Fill in your name at the thumb.

What a good lesson.

Marisa said...

Oh my goodness! This post made me cry! What a good reminder that we are never truly alone!

Jendi said...

My children have started saying, "God is always with you." I didn't realize that I said it so much until they started telling it to each other.

Thanks for the great post.

Holly said...

I have spoken that verse to my children numerous times! I hold very tightly to it as well. I am praying for this family. How wonderful that we serve a God who knows all the details. . .

It's A Vivas Thing said...

Thank you for sharing!

Lisa @ Stop and Smell the Chocolates said...

Thank you for sharing that with us - a good reminder!

Mandy said...

Wow. I have goosebumps. You're a good mommy.

Aunt LoLo said...

This mama has tears in her eyes. Thank you.

Last night, I was nursing my son while hubs put the toddler to bed. I told him to let her know that I'd be in to kiss her goodnight as soon as baby brother was taken care of.

Well, he took a little longer than I thought, and it was American Idol night, and I wanted to get to bed at a decent hour...and I just forgot. By the time I remembered, she'd been asleep for over an hour. Hubs convinced me to go downstairs and wake her up - not for her, but for me. I needed my kisses from my first baby.

Holly said...

This is a great post!!