Tuesday

Men's Week: Men & Mom Blogs

I am a mom.

This is a mom blog.

I write about my good days filled with amber-colored sweet tea and sniffin' the necks of my yummy kids.

I write about my bad days filled with super glue, Taco Bell and The Heimlich Maneuver.  

I post about my feelings and fears, my vanities and victories.

You understand; because you are a mom.

Or are you?

I assume, as I type furiously in my pajamas, at my laptop, that my readers are women. 

I mean, I know there are occasional male readers.  Who else would leave the toilet seat up?

*Snort*

But seriously, every once in awhile when I write about moaning over Strawberry Shortcake or post pictures of my rear view, it dawns on me after the fact (like weeks later) that men might be reading what was intended well, really, for women.  

And then, I feel weird.

Don't get me wrong.  I like men.  Especially, the one who is sitting next to me, reading over my shoulder.  I value his opinion and he reads just about everything I write.  He likes me. He's nice that way.

But I've heard through the grapevine, that some of the men in my extended life think my blog is too personal.

Probably.  But don't we (women) want it that way?

Even my own sweet hubby, had second thoughts about me posting this.  But I'm so glad I did. Why?  Because you encouraged me and helped me through a difficult time.

And so, here's the crux, do you write with all this in mind and not say all you're thinking or just let it all hang out?  Well.  I'm not exactly a 'let all hang out kind of girl, but you know what I mean.

Not to mention, there are some great dad blogs out there.  Do a lot of men comment on your blog?  Do you visit dad blogs?

Help me, oh, my dear internet friends.  We're focusing on men this week and I need a woman's view!

By the way, in celebration of MEN'S WEEK, I'm giving away a much-needed item for the man in your life, every day this week!  Yahooooooo!

This is up for grabs.  What man wouldn't want a giant universal remote control?  I'll choose a random number from the comments and close this little giveaway down around  10 pm (CST).



Men's Cookbook Winner:  P.S. He Loves You. Congrats, girl!  (Email me your address and I'll mail it tomorrow)

48 comments:

Tausha said...

ok-I think that men that read blogs about women that they don't know are weird and they are probably few and far between, so I think that you should fee ok. As for your b-i-l, tell him if he thinks that it is too personl for this tastes-that he doesn't have to read it. I think that if your hubby is ok with what you are posting-they he should be the only man the matters.
LOve the blog. Always makes me happy. I always know that you will have great ideas, plus I will never run into something that I don't want to see on here.
Thanks again four your great words!

Favaunt said...

As long as NO weird pictures of me surface, I say write about anything your heart desires. Don't forget, though, that I get to make any comments that I want. (ha ha)

PS I love your blog, too. Very, very informative.

World's Greatest Mommy said...

I don't think you can write constantly thinking about what the people who read are going to think. Part of your magic is that there are literally times when you write what we didn't know we wanted to read about. I know there are men that read your blog, because I share a lot of your posts with my husband.

The thing is...real men who deal with real women, deal with all the things you talk about.

My husband begged me just last week to please stock up on feminine products so that he can have one break in 11 years from buying them at the grocery store.

Most real men have at one time put tampons on a conveyor belt and tried not to make eye contact with a teenage grocery checker as she rang them up.

And as for your "need a moment" post? I fell in love with your blog during that post. I put you on my list of daily places to visit, and have been back every day since. You are real. There are not so pretty moments in your life. Painful moments that never happened to June Cleaver and her spotless crew.

Thanks for those moments. Real women and men appreciate them.

Pink Lemonade Liz said...

I agree with worlds greatest mummy - don't worry about who "might" be reading... Write just as you normally would. If a few of the boys stop by - maybe they're just trying to figure out how we girls think...

Dawn said...

"Ditto" on the two comments above mine. If you changed your style, well then wouldn't be YOUR style, would it?

Blessings! Dawn

Laura@Storytellin' Mama said...

I think it is an interesting topic. I haven't read many Daddy blogs, but I'd like to...

I have only been blogging for a couple months, but my father in law has already had some comments. He grew up in a small town, family things were private, he's concerned about the pictures, what about safety. He's talked to me, to my husband to my mother in law.

I was honest with him and said it is something for me. I have four kids, I'm not good at scrap booking, I like to write. A blog is perfect. It feels like mine and I love it. He can read it or not.

I'm pretty sure he reads it every day and he seems to have backed down to my frankness. I do understand his perspective. Anyway, just some thoughts.

I love your blog in the month I've been reading it. Some of the posts are so moving and hilarious. I want to work my way through some of your archives. Thank you!

nottryingforaboy said...

I do visit a dad blog (http://www.apparenting.com/) and I also make my husband read some blogs on days where I think he might enjoy what has been written. I know he's read yours a few times.

I have the attitude that I write for myself, not for my readers. If I do have a few readers that keep coming back, excellent. But if I lose some people I'm not interesting enough, oh well.

Mycrazylife said...

Kristen,

Yes we do like it that way, so don't let them tell you otherwise, because well...they are men and as nice and handy as they might be, they don't actually *get* us and honestly, I kinda like it that way.

PS- That was your sweet tea recipe on my table the other day, ehem...with lemons. I have to have my lemons. Everyone loved it, so thank you for sharing!

Miss Erica said...

I know I'm a chick, so maybe I don't know how guys feel about your sharing, but I'm a sharing kind of gal and I wouldn't want you to write any other way. It makes us feel closer to you, and like we're not alone in thinking/feeling/experiencing what we do. So thanks, and keep on keepin' on.

P.S. He loves you... said...

OMG!!!

I don't believe I won!!!
How cool!!!


Thanks Kristen YOU ARE SOOOO my FAV Blogger now!!!

((HUGS))

Gigi said...

I've been struggling with "putting personal stuff out there" since I began blogging a few months ago, but I'm not good at keeping a journal. (A big blank piece of paper can be overwhelming at times.) So as much as I try not to get very detailed about things, it's nice to have a record of sorts. I tell myself I can type a few paragraphs in a small box without worrying too much about those who will be reading it. It's my blog after all, and it's therapeutic.

Your blog is amazing and lifts me each time I read it! Thank you and keep it up.

Lisa J said...

I love your blog the way it is. You are real and that is what counts. Plus you are very inspiring and motivating, would we want it any other way? I think not. Don't change a thing for us. Only if your family needs you to change would it then be ok!!! Have a great day!

jennifer said...

Kristen, if you hold back is it still YOU? That is a question only you can answer.

I had a period of time when I realized how many people who actually new me were reading my blog. It gave me pause for a while there. I wasn't sure if I should write the way I thought. Then I thought, "If this isn't me being me, why am I doing it?"

I like the way you write and I love your humor. I get a blessing
when I visit your blog. But ultimately, you are going to have to decide what is best for you and your family.

Be blessed.

Jennifer

Kristen said...

You know, I've been wondering a lot about this too. Not just with men reading but with personal life (too much spilling over into my own blogs!) Tonight I created an anonymous blog where I can write a little more personally and not feel so "out there". My husband thought it was a good idea, too. To keep the other blogs a little seperate. And yet allow my friends personal access and visitors access but without the actual claim to "who I am". Confusing, I know.

BTW, my name is Kristen and I am going to have to tell you that you stole my yahoo email addres. lol. kristenwrites TAKEN! ; )

I love your blog, I write for The Internet Cafe, too and found you through them. I've been reading since...

misty said...

The 2 people that have been coming to my blog the longest are men. And I talk about having cramps, my baby sticking her hands in her diapers and making poo handprints on the fridge, boob sweat, and all number of things. My rule always is, if I am comfortable with it, then it's all good. You're not gonna please everyone. And if they happen upon your site, and they do not like what they see... they do not HAVE to come back.

Awesome remote, I'd love to win it for my hubby. Thanks so much for the opportunity.

mistchlo[at]hughes[dot]net

marky said...

LOL..
It never dawned on me that men read our blogs!
You have a very creative entertaining blog..that I believe anyone reading it would enjoy.

mannequin said...

My husband has asked me what sites I am visiting and has seen a few of them. One day, I walked into his office and he was on a mom site. "EEWW"...I said. "What are you doing?" I felt ...violated.
He said he just wanted to see what the big attraction was. I think if men DO visit the girls it's only out of curiosity. You know men..

Christie O. said...

my husband gets mad at me too about what i talk about on my blog. when we were taking our baby to the cardiologist because the doctor heard something in there -- i posted about it. when i had a premature baby two years ago, i posted about it. blogging, for me, is very much like journaling. yes, there is a lot i won't say (like my ss # and my phone number and things like that). but if i'm going to bother writing, why wouldn't i write about what i am thinking about? the only writing i think is worth reading is honest writing.

yes, there is a flip side. when i get down to thinking who *might* be reading, yes, sometimes it scares me that what i am writing goes on the internet and it makes me think twice sometimes. but then when someone reads something i wrote and they tell me it spoke to them, i know that it was worth it for me to share whatever it was i wrote. if i never get a comment in my life, that's fine. i will still write what i am thinking.

Peter Dyrholm said...

Difference between women and men is not really new. Every now and then I read blogs here and there. And well unless there are pictures you really don't want to surface in the paper when you become a celebrity... it's no big deal.
Even though my dear wife (jacki) writes just about everything. I really don't mind at all. Sometimes I actually learn something new about her and I see how she loves writing and forming a small community. How can that be bad?

Keep on posting on whatever is on your mind. If a man reads it and really don't want to know he should be able to ignore the few lines of text much the same way he ignores the toilet seat ;-)

Mom of TWO Princesses said...

I don't know if men read my blog or not. I haven't had any comment, if they did, lol. I have thought about it, though. And I worry about the pictures of my girls, that I post. I've been putting a copyright on my pictures, "just in case". lol

I love your blog... I hope that you continue to post the way you have been. You've made me laugh & nod my head in understanding so many times! I love your sense of humor & sarcasim.

Let the others have said, if someone doesn't like it, they have the choice to not read it. ;)

Frantic Home Cook said...

I do read some men's blogs. My fave is agoodhusband.net. It helps me appreciate the good guy I have and gives me ideas on how to be a better wife.

Francie

The Van Fam said...

You pose a very good question...

First, I think you keep blogging the way you have always been blogging. Unlike many conversations men have with women daily, they can just close the blog and not read anymore if it's too much. It could be worse...they could be standing face to face with you and not be able to get you to shut up! So please do write on, and write as you always have. That's why I (a woman and a mom) check it daily!

As far as men bloggers. And men reading women blogs in general. The only male blogger that I read is Travis Cottrell's blog. He's a dad and many times he blogs about his kids. And I love it. I am kinda wiered out by men reading my blog that I don't know. My husband doesn't even read it. I do know of one guy we know reading it and not because he commented. No, instead we were at a wedding for a mutual friend and he brought up the whole issue of my husband accusing me of using too much toilet paper at a time and THEN gave me his mom's opinion on the matter. Really?

I think you rock. I think your blog rocks. And I think you should keep blogging the way you do!

Sarah said...

I'm not a mom but I am a woman.... and I say, if a man thinks your blog is too "personal," he should probably stop reading it. The blog is yours, not theirs.

Your blog is HILARIOUS, REAL, and I am sort of addicted to checking it... so you go girl!!

The Fritz Facts said...

I don't read men blogs, but that is only because it doesn't affect me in the same way. The writting is different, and the feeling is different.

I do think of others when I write, only because of personal things going on in my life. I don't want/need people to know certain things, and they are few and far between.

My hubby has been hinting at the oversized remote for a while, but I never caved in to get it. He would love it!

Good & Crazy said...

I keep thinking the same thing. Pretty much the only men reading my stuff is my husband and occasionally my father or a couple brothers. I figure if they can't stand a little PMS talk, then 'do they really love me'??

I've been here before, not sure I commented though! So Hi!

Caution said...

I began blogging so my parents and sisters could "stay in touch" with my kids' daily lives. Later, I regretted having told them about the blog because there were things I wanted to say without their censure. My FIL reads my blog and then has his wife "interpret" it for him!

Memarie Lane said...

I don't think your blog gets too personal, you don't mention bodily fluids or anything like that.

I have maybe 10% male readers. I love hearing from men, and when I write I keep their sensibilities in mind too.

Tammy said...

How hilarious is that remote!! My husband and I just saw one of those and laughed over the thing. I'm sure inside his head he had a bit of "remote envy". :-)

Robin said...

We DO NOT need that giant remote at our house. I'm sure all 4! boys would be fighting over it and I'd never get to watch Jon&Kate plus 8 or Little People Big World again.

I wouldn't worry about who's reading your blog. If a man dares to read it, let him. He might learn something that will make him a better husband or dad!

Nancy M. said...

I love reading about everything you write on your blog. Women are more personal by nature than men! So keep writing about the real stuff in your life. I enjoy it very much!

Bina said...

I read men's blogs, men read my blog, and there is never anything not appropriate said between the two. Some men are actually better at commenting. You know, things like, "I'm so sorry to hear that. Hope things get better." With nothing like "WHY do you put up that? What's wrong with you?" stuff thrown in.

I've never thought you share too much. Believe, I've read TOO much on some blogs so I do have personal experience! I love your blog just the way it is, and would hate to see it change.

Tara said...

I don't read daddy blogs, and I've had no men comment on my blog.

I like your blog because you're frank and honest (and hilarious). I think it would lose something if you shared less.

I hope you keep up the great work!

(Pick someone else if I win the remote. We have too many remotes as it is.)

Jenn said...

1) I don't visit dad blogs

2) Dad's don't visit mine

3) I love your openess!

Miscellaneous From Missy said...

This is just me: I blog for myself and for God's glory.

1. For myself, because it makes me happy and helps my brain feel more organized. I know that if I start worrying about how to get more readers/commenters then I would over-analyze every word and every subject. That's not fun for me. I rarely tell people about my blog. Not because I don't want them to read it, but because it's just something I do for fun for myself. If they read it, that's fine and if they don't, that's fine too.

2. For God's glory, because I Cor. 10:31 says, "So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God." and Gal. 1:10 says, "Am I now trying to win human approval, or God's approval? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ."

Ask God what you should blog, and then don't worry about what others think! (Although, asking for advice like you did is also wise, just make sure you filter it through God.) Hope this helps! :-)

Michelle@Life with Three said...

You know, I never really considered that men might be reading my blog. I can't imagine the stuff I'm writing about would be of any interest, but maybe it is. Come to think of it, I have had one male comment on a Menu Plan Monday post. It kind of surprised me, but I thought it was pretty cool.

A Couple of Kitchen Ditchers said...

THAT IS SO TRUE!!!! WE had to start a secret blog, cause our husbands kept reading them, and sometimes you just wanna write, women understand... men just dont get it!

COMcewens said...

I dont know if you even have a chance to read all the comments, so I always hesitate making a comment... but this is SO true! I write towards women, moms, cause I think they understand. I know my husband doesnt understand my post as much as other women do!

Becoming Me said...

I always assumed that men do not read Becoming Me. It's fairly "girly." It's personal, but I don't think I've ever mentioned "female stuff" as my husband refers to things like menstruation. But it is very relational, filled with spiritual struggles, etc. My husband reads it and he responds to each post the same way "Well written, but sad." I always think my posts have more of an uplifting message. However, I say all that to make the point that I was sure men don't read it. However, a month ago , our male small group leader (he and his wife co-lead), mentioned reading Beth Moore's blog and Rocks in My Dryer. He also mentioned liking my blog. I was stunned. He's not he type Arnold would call girly either. This is a 6.6 200 pound sports fanatic. And then just two weeks ago, I started getting comments from a man in Great Britain who has an Christian environmental blog. It really hasn't changed the way I blog though. I still write with mainly women in mind. However, since my husband recently asked for posting privileges at my, now our, family blog, I have made that one less personal and promised him that I will never mention having my period of any of my female organs on that blog.

Happy Mommy said...

I have 2 or 3 male readers but they never comment on the blog, I know them in person so we talk about what I write. So most of the readers I have are woman.

Darla said...

I read some dad blogs (like busydad and frugal dad), not a lot cuz I'm a girlie kinda girl.

If men read here and don't like the topic they can just click the x right? I mean you didn't disable the x of all things...or did you? ;)

auds at barking mad said...

I do write with the fact that not just MEN (lots of them read my blog as my hubby has somehow managed to let the URL get around at his office) but male family members and friends read the blog.

However, the larger issue for me is not being overly personal. I think sometimes I sit on the edge of overdoing it and I don't want to, because a lot of what has been going on in the last six months is both painful and I don't want the privacy of my family invaded and I don't want to leave myself open to the judgement of others.

The other thing that I have carried with me after more than a decade as a radio broadcast professional is that I can never take my own privacy for granted. There are some freaks out there, plain and simple.

But I do have days where I want nothing more than to vent like mad and let it ALL hang out. Sometimes I feel like if I post it all, I might get a few other perspectives that I hadn't thought of before. The flip side of that though is that I fear it would leave my readers (all seven of them) with a sour taste in their mouth. Not that I think my blog has an impact, good or bad, on anyone, but I wouldn't want someone to go away wishing they hadn't read it.

Sorry for the verbose comment, its just that your post got me thinking.

Lisa @ Stop and Smell the Chocolates said...

I don't need the giant remote, by the way!!

I don't think there are men reading my blog, other than my husband. I don't think they would be interested.

I love your blog and showed my husband and son the pic of your hubby "shooting" at a squirrel!! They really enjoyed that...which reminds me, I don't think you've updated us in a while.

Keep blogging the way you do...

Elle said...

The men in my life do not read Blogs.
I only read Mom Blogs - good questions

Mother Hen said...

Yeah, I had a man comment on my blog once. It wasn't a real personal, intimate, revealing kind of post, but I sorta flipped anyway. It was just kinda weird, like being over-heard, only in print and forever.

Karen said...

My hubby will read blogs with me if he's nearby while I'm reading. And he is starting to actively participate in the writing of my blog (by giving suggestions for stories and wording, etc.). But, if left alone with a computer, he would only look at homedepot.com or watch news videos.

Janel said...

Don't change a thing!
We are just wired differently. I find men think much of what women share with each other is too personal.

Love that remote! So fun!

Gotta GROW with it said...

i am guilty of letting it all hang out...and even after finding out my neighbor...(the dad) reads my blog...i still can't resist. i suppose i just need to look the other way while waving at him so he doesn't see me blush!

Amy B said...

I'm all about transparency. My in-laws, neighbors, and my husbands co-workers read my blog. I'm just like whatever. If I were in front of a microphone I would blurt it out anyway so what is the difference? LoL

I love your blog and I hope you always keep it real. That is what sets you apart!