Thursday

Sincerely 'Fro Me to You-The Strangling

Last week I started a little weekly blast from my past.  I call it "Sincerely 'Fro Me to You" because I'm fond of my childhood afro.  And because I'm sincere.

  
Very sincere.

The picture I grabbed out of my overflowing photo box that will NEVER see the inside of a scrapbook for obvious reasons is of my two children about six years ago.

A picture speaks a 1000 words, so the saying goes.  


And this photo is certainly screaming something: pain, struggle, 'help me' comes to mind.

This entire period of my life is a blur.  I remember snippets of it.  I think most of it has been blocked out for my protection.

My husband and I lived in Florida.  Our daughter was two and our son was a few months old. We didn't have any money.  We didn't have any friends.  We didn't like the church we were Youth Pastors at.  We lived on love.  

When we could muster it up.

It was hard.  

I remember this day though. 

The morning started out terrible.  My little girl decided to 'share' Skittles bite-sized candies with her 4 month old brother.  I called 9-1-1 when I saw red 'blood' oozing from the corners of his mouth.  Let's not even discuss that my TWO-YEAR-OLD WAS EATING CANDY FOR BREAKFAST.  It's called survival, my friend.  Pure and simple.

Our nearest relative was a thousand miles away.  I felt so guilty they didn't have any photos of our kids, especially the baby.

So, I dressed them.  Well.  Sort of.  I cleaned their sticky bodies.  I had postpartum.  They had clean underpants.  

This was no small victory.

I decided a picture was in order, you know, in case another disaster struck.

And so with my disposable camera and a burst of courage, I put my baby in my two year-old's lap for a picture.  Not my finest moment.  

You know what's funny?  I was so proud that I got them together in one photo. 

When I got around to developing that roll of film 2 years later, our lives had changed considerably, so had my perspective.  

That's when I noticed it was a photo of an attempted strangling.

I was glad my relative never got the photo.

'Cause now I can laugh.


Food for the Soul:

Psalm 30:5 "...Weeping may endure for a night, but Joy Comes in The Morning."


35 comments:

Valarie said...

At first I thought she was holding a baby doll. Then I realized no, no its the real thing. It takes me forever to develop film. Thank goodness for digital. Instant gratification. By the way the picture on the bottom of the kids is gorgeous. They look so sweet.

Beautiful Craziness said...

How time flies! Encouragement for those of us at the begining of this crazy stage we call "Having children." Of course, there is hope in seeing that you started over again!

Heather J. said...

Oh!
I remember those days.
It is only now, I can look back and smile.
I smile in acknowedgement that the Lord really never gave me more than I could handle and we survived!
One day, I'll look back on this time and be thankful I have such wonderful children.....I mostly think like that, now...in between wishing them in college!

Vintage Dutch Girl said...

That pic is hilarious! I REALLY thought the baby was a doll!

I'm glad your perspective has changed, and, your happiness in your current life situation.

Keep me laughing Kristen!

marky said...

Oh sister I can so relate! I had PPD after #3 was born, and those days were truly a dark blur at best. As for developing film, well I have a roll here from ??? and you have inspired me to drop it off today to be devloped. Now will I remember to pick it up?
Thanks for the trip down memory lane today.

Jane @ Kidzarama said...

I was going to comment on the pictures of your behind (I would melt, too), but then I saw this photo.

I swear I must have exactly the same one stored in our computer somewhere.

I also have *stong* memories of Wren (aged 3) 'carrying' Mr Bump (about 4mths) BY HIS HEAD! I turned around and there they were.

Although even if I had been holding the camera, I would have dropped it and rushed to the rescue... No ill effects, except more grey hairs for me!

Wonderful World of Weiners said...

You call it strangling....I call it sibling bonding!!

Hallie :)

Domestic Accident said...

I'm with you. I hardly remember 2 whole years of my sleep deprived life. I agree it must be for my own protection.

I think that photo is like a trophy. You did survive. You may not remember the details, but you know it was ugly but beautiful all at the same time. Living on love? That's beautiful.

Lilypad Mom said...

Knowing how hard it is to get a 2 year old in a photo, I'm impressed you got both of them in the same shot, strangle hold or not!

Sometimes it can be really nice to look back on old photos and realize just how far you have come and how much things have changed.

Allison said...

That was laugh-out-loud funny, Kristen...and BTW, at first glance, I thought the picture was of you!!

Carol Van Rooy said...

I too thought it was a doll. It's those moments that will be cherished in pictures for ever... despite the initial shock value.

Colleen said...

You know, it may not be the greatest photo, but after the story you tell its just as precious as if they were sitting side-by-side in their Sunday finest! Very cute. :O)

Marcy Massura said...

Man - you really make me laugh...REALLY. Bored? Okay so check out my sons blog. The header I did for him is from a similar moment in my life....they are in pajamas..that was the best I could do as well.I was in Chicago and lonley and insane. And my husband travelled every other week. Oh the joy of thsoe times...
www.theocbrotherblog.blogspot.com

THopgood said...

I love that picture! You SHOULD scrap about it so your kids can laugh about it too!

twinklemom said...

ROFL...Not only should you scrap it..but make it available to the highest bidder when they get older and need blackmail material. LOL

It's just amazing the memories we gain from our children and that secret reflection of ...is this payback for something we must have done to our own siblings at one time? LOL

Bina said...

Okay, seriously, doesn't EVERY family have a photo like this? My mom has one of my older sister holding me, and I swear it's almost the same picture!!! I even LOOKED like a boy cause I was in a diaper, and I didn't have hair until I was two!!!!!

I like it. And you know, it just makes you more grateful of how far you have come, right????

Faerie Mom said...

Ah, the joys of sibling "bonding"! I had/ have PPD with my latest. I struggle every day with some of the same things you mentioned. All of my family is in FL... sigh. The first 6 months or so of littlest ones life are a blur, a mystery, a miracle that we all survived. This pic brought it all back! LOL

twin power mommy said...

hello, new to your blog. that picture cracks me up! you have a way with words. i don't ever know how to say anything witty. anyway, those pics of your bum are quite funny too. i take it your man is a butt man. :D
hope you have a wonderful day!
feel free to stop on over and check out my blog anytime!:)

lori said...

With 3, the second one came into the world SCREAMING...she screamed and completely disrupted my perfect vision of a stay at home mom....no kidding...oh and she has RED hair to boot...It is a COMPLETE BLUR and for my own good...I agree. My husband would leave for work and come home and say "you look so defeated..." WELL BUDDY, I AM...that baby has SCREAMED all day and I can't make it better...The other one would only occasionally notice and say "make HER stop..." It's amazing they LIKE each other today, apparently SHE blocked it all out too! NOW we laugh....HA! well sorta, kinda...what I remember of it, was just soooo not fun...I took pics of her screaming to send to her when she has a baby who just can't stop....to REMIND her...:)

I'm sure I could find some STRANGLING ones too....
but that's a BLUR too....and now I think I'm losing my mind....hmmm...wow..YOU GOTTA LAUGH!

hugs,
lori

lori said...

Oh yeah...just noticed I broke into the TOP 20 today!!! the rest of the adoring fans must be out shopping....HA!! VICTORY...small but MINE!

Heather said...

We need these reminders so we don't go there again. Even if I was in a fog, I don't want to repeat it.

Baby Mama (Tamra) said...

My 2yo always tries to hold our newborn the same way~ If they learn by imitation, does it really look like i hold the baby that way??!! Too funny!

Tiff said...

LOL! At least your days are brighter now!My boys like to hug but there version of hugging is a bear hug that causes theother to fall . . and then cry. . and then run to mommy and tell on the other.

Crystal said...

Ah the dangers of hugs... I often have to try and protect my baby from getting hurt by the love of her big sister. Thank goodness baby's are resilient!

Tanja said...

I absolutely identify with this post. Some days clean underwear is just the best it gets. For me... never mind the kids! :-) The verse at the end is one of my favorites. I've clung to it often!

Kupiec Baby Blog said...

I kept looking at the picture trying to figure out if your daughter was holding a doll. LOL - the baby does look a tad bit uncomfortable!

I love the verse. And Psalm 30:5 seems to appropriate for your posting!

Miss Erica said...

Love it. Those are the best kinds of pictures to look back on. Way better than the "perfect" posed pictures, sometimes. My 2.5 year old tries to hold her baby sister, and results tend to be similar.

4kids&luvit said...

That's great! I love reading your blog- you're so real and you make me laugh just when I need it!

BrownEyedGirl-- said...

Ha, I love the verse! And I thought your child was a doll that had been manhandled.

Katie said...

Thank you for this. I am currently in this season of Mommy-Hood with all of its many blessings. Sometimes I feel so blessed I want to run screaming from the house. It is helpful to know I'm not alone.

Jae said...

Oh!!! I'm laughing with you, most definitely!! The first two years of my sons' lives are a blur ... I just know we made it cuz we're here! And you should be proud! They're together and I doubt he has any recollection of the event. ;)

Thank you for your post earlier today!! :) Nice to know someone understands.

Darla said...

Oh bless your heart!

I love your candor!!!!!

Christine @ Serenity How? said...

Oh, now that's not so bad. My younger sister is just under a year younger than I am (yikes!) and my family just looooves to talk about how I treated the baby when she came around. Sheesh, I was only one!

Apparently I held her in my lap and sang to her while smacking her in the face to the beat. She turned out pretty much okay, BTW.

mah-meeee said...

First time on your blog and just the title of your blog totally caught my eye!

Great post, I have a pic of my two daughters recently doing just that. My 3.5 'trying' to hold her sister (4 months old) in her lap. The baby nearly fell off... good thing I snapped a pic before I had to rescue the baby!

PhotoChick said...

Very cute post - loved the part about the skittles! Too funny :o) (to us anyway...)

Much love & God Bless